Hello World.

Dear Reader,

Hey Sexies! My name is Bernadette, Bernie for short. Kind of like Bernie Mac but without the penis and I'm alive. For those of you with a dark sense of humor, high five for laughing. For those of you that don't... I was just trying to make a distinction, deal with it.
I'm a 20 year old average female addicted to facebook and crack cocaine. One of those facts was a lie, you get to choose. I like boys, bad horror movies and books about sex. Yes, I do have Marquis de Sade's "La Philosophie dans la Boudoir" on my bookshelf. You should read it. I'm also in crush with my English Professor. It's hot. My boyfriend is a little jealous.
I'm about to go watch Zombieland because I just found out that Abigail Breslin is in it and she is Legitimate. So I will leave you to your internet porn and facebook obsessions. However, I am warning you, internet porn kills computers. Just ask my Dell. Never again will she open up for amateur porn. That's because she's dead.

Peace Out.

<3 Me.